"i've been trying to leave you for the longest time..."

sooooooo.. yeah. i suck at this.
haha, like seriously? i said i was gonna write every day & its been over a week since i wrote last.. hm, maybe i'll write every week?

the funny thing is that i havent even been busy! i mean i went to the movies & out to dinner with some friends.. but i mean, really? i haven't i been writing? i dont know.. ok! anyways, lets get past this & onto some actual blogging! yay!

OK. so, the first thing to know about me is that i have extreme guy problems. cliche right? ha, i know, i know. but, honestly? its bad. because he is 2 years older than me, he will be going to college this year while i, sadly, will be staying in high school. i'm usually the one who has her stuff together & i totally enjoyed being single! i mean everyone who's single says that, but i actually loved it! & not like a "all over guys all the time" single, i was just a focused student honestly. boring & focused.

so, okay. here's the problem. he says he has no time for me. which sounds harsh, but he doesn't! its insane. i have never met anyone so busy in my entire life. i can get past that though.. as long as he texts me & spends time with me occasionally.. but he says he doesn't want to hurt me by no being able to spend time with me. so, this is why we broke up. now you'd think it would be over? i mean, thats normal, right? but no. it's like we're still dating. & not like a little week fling, ok let's move on. it has been over 3 months. OVER 3 MONTHS! i mean.. i like him so much (cliche), but we're not dating.. & i have actually tried to move on, but i do feel like i can't get over this. when i think about losing him, it just makes me feel so scared..

& it's funny bc i used to be the girl that was always giving other girls advice on relationship problems, but since people have learned of my situation people don't even ask me anymore! its awful.. i can hardly think about anything else & it's almost as if it's taking over my life. does any have any advice for me?

so that is one of the main issues in my life. & i'll write again in a day, a week, or maybe even a month! ha, who knows?